"You don't understand the basic assumptions of your own culture if your own culture is the only culture you know...Everybody operates on certain basic assumptions, but very few people know what those assumptions are....the only way you find out is by contrasting the way you look at something to the way it is looked in another culture." Alan Watts, The Tao of Philosophy.
It has been over a month now since I have written. Life seems to just pass me by. Sometimes the easiest way to document my time is to take an excessive amount of photos. I have been trying to find some inspiration but maybe I have had writers block. There is so much to say but voicing my thoughts is harder than it seems sometimes. And I probably could go on for hours. So I figure I will start with culture...if there is one thing someone wants to experience in life the most, and that thing is culture, take yourself to the opposite side of the world from where you are, and you are certain to find that.
I'm still in the adjustment period here. Trying to find my bearings constantly. Getting around, where do i buy a swiffer, im not eating dog, sorry, my hot water needs to be turned on at least an hour before i want to shower, there are no dryers here so if i wash a load it will be at least another 24 hours until I can wear the same thing-- the best part about that (not) is that I wear a uniform for work, and they only gave me two shirts that don't even fit very well. I made it work, but HAD to get another one.
But, I have to back up a bit. In our TEFL course we took, the teacher, taught us from a book called Teaching English in China by Robert Wyss and Emily Thrush PhD. They described to us the stages of cultural adjustment. Now, I am not sure where the theory comes from, so I cannot speak to that, but I do know, and have seen us (the group I took the course with) are all experiencing these stages.
There are only 5, so bare with me. The first is the Preliminary Stage-- this is the period of time right before you leave your home, or wherever you are moving from. A pretty basic stage. The second is Initial Euphoria... when I would post or talk about how much I loved China, when I first got here, was my initial euphoria. I do love living here, but it definitely takes time to adjust to your surroundings. Which leads to the next stage Irritability and Hostility... need I say more? Euphoria and Hostility stages are interchangable and can last for an extended period of time-- sometimes up to 3-5 years. My experience with the hostility stage was and can be emotional. It is very frustrating when you are trying to deal with Chinese banks and they cut off all money you have. Trying to communicate with someone who can speak 5 words of English, and not speaking enough Chinese to express my frustration is very exhausting. Some days you walk around and just want to be able to get everything done in your native language because that is what you are used to and know best. When someone doesn't understand you completely makes you want to start screaming and yelling, and burst out crying all at once. When this happened to me, I just kept having to take deep breaths. I also called a few people in my group to vent and seek guidance. We ended up getting it sorted by going to another bank. Evidently (which I had partially seen while I was there talking to the teller, but also realized later) was that the first teller didn't like the fact that I was female and American. He wanted me to provide excessive amounts of documents showing that I could live and work in China, and all I needed was to change the pin on my debit card. At the next bank, I handed the woman my passport and card and two minutes later she handed it back and I was good to go.
There is also an adjustment to be made with food, nothing is the same as the states, shopping, transportation, renting an apartment, cooking, sleeping, bathing, anything you can imagine.. it all has to change when you move here. But it is the way in which you handle it that proves whether you can live abroad or not. You must be adaptable-- but while trying to adapt, there are hiccups. We are so used to our ways that it's hard to make the permanent transition. You half expect to wake up one day and everything is back to the way it was. But, that's not going to happen. Have patience. I feel I have moved out of the Hostility stage, not completely, but there was about a week of anger and frustration and homesickness, but I over came it. Which leads to the gradual adjustment period. You slowly transition into accepting your surroundings. (On a side note, these stages usually last much longer for most people. People who moved here the same time I did might still be in the Initial Euphoria stage. I have seen some hostility from some of them, but not much of it.) I made it through the stages quicker because of having lived here before. It is much different because my parents and Boeing aren't here to take care of everything. So it is an adjustment. But thats the best part of the experience.
The next stage is Adaptation and Biculturalism-- basically you reach this stage when you no longer feel like a "foreginer" -- I think it took me about 5 years to get there last time I lived here, so it will be a while. It can take up to 5 years to get there. The last stage is the Re-Entry phase--- this stage occurs when you go back to where you came from.
Now if that made any sense, I experienced this moving back to the States after living here for 8 years. now, it wasn't as drastic because I didnt have communication problems. But I had a lot of adjusting to do. I don't know if I ever got out of the foreigner stage though. I think even on the day I left I was still feeling that way.
But anyhooooo--- as for me. I am working and teaching. I have a busy schedule but weekdays I don't work until 2 so i have time to get things done or go places. I have decided that I will make the most of this year. I don't know if I will still be here a year or two from now, (I do hope to be, but life happens sometimes). So given a year, I want to see and experience as much as possible. I hope to start saving money as well, so if I am here next year, I can spend more time traveling. I want to see the world. And I will be here to share it with whoever wants to experience it with me.
(On an end note I do want to give credit where it belongs, but my bibliography skills are rusty-- so, the book I got my ideas from is Teaching English In China, by Robert Wyss and Emily A Thrush PhD. Written in 2007.)
